Green Lantern (2011)

A visual delight hampered with a plodding narrative, this hit-or-miss superhero origin story has cocky test pilot (is there any other kind) Hal Jordan unwittingly assigned to be a Green Lantern, a sort-of intergalactic patrolman with unthinkable powers. The film starts out great, with a terrific intro scene for the primary villain, Parralax, an exciting attack scene with another Lantern, Abin Sur, and a strong introduction to Hal Jordan as he accidentally destroys his fighter plane in an attempt to thwart two state-of-the-art stealth bombers during a test run. Abin Sur crash lands on Earth and is led to Jordan by the power of his ring, the key weapon of the Lanterns, which automatically seeks out whoever is worthy of possessing it. Jordan is then whisked away by the ring to Oa, the HQ for the Green Lantern Corps, where he is taught the basics of his newfound powers by three vastly different-looking Lanterns named Tomar-Re, Kilowog, and Sinestro. Meanwhile, back on Earth, an acquaintance of Jordan, Hector Hammond, is assigned to perform an autopsy on Abin Sur for the government, but, in the process, he is exposed to an alien organism that begins to both cloud his thoughts and provide telekinetic abilities. However, it is here the quality of the film starts to get a smidgen rocky; after being overworked in his training, and being told by Sinestro that he isn't worthy of Abin Sur's legacy, Jordan up and quits, keeping the ring, but returning to Earth assignment- and responsibility-free. We then get an alarming number of build-up scenes, with Jordan and Hammond dealing with their increasingly powerful abilities, along with their bouts with self-esteem and self-worth, before the third-act barrels in and saves the day with a plethora of action, colorful eye candy, and exciting hero moments.

If there are two huge flaws of this movie (I'll get to the other one later), one of them is the lack of Oa in the finished film. I do not know whether the filmmakers could not scramble the effects shots together in time, or whether the screenwriters actually didn't think the home planet of the Lantern Corps was that interesting, but after Jordan makes it to Oa, his elongated return to Earth seems relatively safe, unoriginal, and, occasionally, rather boring. Imagine if in The Last Starfighter, Alex never contacts Centauri to get back into the fight against the Ko-Dan Armada, and he remains in the trailer park wondering if he was worthy of being a Starfighter until Xur finally hunts him down and faces him mano a mano. The plethora of Green Lanterns we are briefly introduced to ends up coming off as a massive tease; it is not enough to promise more of them in a sequel after they have been introduced and then eschewed for goofy flirty scenes with Jordan and his love interest, Carol Ferris, played by Blake Lively.

Which brings me to the second huge flaw of the film which is, surprise surprise, a forced, lackluster, uninteresting, and underplayed love interest, poorly rendered here by Lively. I place the blame squarely at Lively's feet because a. she does not seem mature enough for neither her bureaucratic position nor her relationship with Jordan, b. her casting screams of a sort of contemporary cynicism that equates widespread fame over concentrated talent, and c. the script actually does try and give her a sense of professionalism and, later in the film, participation in the action scenes, which she deflates with her barely-trying performance. This is not necessarily an attack on Lively as an actress, for she was fairly solid in her white-trash role in The Town, but here, she is a rickety element of the film's foundation.

Which is a shame, because the rest of the cast is fairly awesome. Reynolds is able to coast through this thing on his effortless charm and movie-star good looks, keeping even the most ludicrous of situations grounded with his constant wisecracks; while he is too feminine and goofy to cut a truly badass, Han Solo-esque figure (like, say, Nathan Fillion, the voice of Green Lantern in a recent cartoon), he is well-suited for this superhero schtick. Angela Bassett, Tim Robbins, and Jay O. Sanders are dignified and respectable as various government members related to Jordan and Hammond, and Mark Strong, as well as the voices of Geoffrey Rush and Michael Clarke Duncan, make for killer alien Green Lanterns. But my favorite element of the film had to be Peter Sarsgaard's performance as Hector Hammond. Sporting a terrible haircut, a history professor's mustache, and his trademark snarky mumbling, Sarsgaard plays out Hammond's painfully tragic, well-presented arc with a surprising amount of seriousness and pathos. His character is not the casually dismissed, hot-to-cold mad scientist like Alfred Molina's Doc Ock or, dare I say, Arnold as Mr. Freeze, but rather the relative yin to Hal Jordan's yang; the great dilemma of his character is the question of whether, had he been chosen by the green-powered ring rather than his rotten, yellow-powered infection, he could have ended up as the hero. While his powers end up paling in comparison to those of Parallax, the film's central antagonistic force, his story is far more compelling than either Parallax's or Jordan's, and his screentime proves to be the most richly rewarding in the film. I must also mention the film's near-perfect rendering of Jordan's limitless ring-based powers. For a superpower that is limited, solely, by the extent of human imagination, the ring's intuition-based system is well-presented, and always stems from something we can extrapolate from Jordan's own psyche, rather than some sort of random, FX company-conceived deus ex machina. That was my main concern going into the feature, and I must admit, after noticing the hints at Jordan's future weaponry throughout the film, it seemed to be one of the easier hurdles for the filmmakers to conquer.

Recommended for fans of sci-fi/fantasy-oriented superhero flicks like Hellboy, Thor, or The Incredibles. In terms of the superhero flicks out right now, I'd say it ranks somewhere above X-Men: First Class, but not quite up to the character and world-building excellence of Thor. That being said, I'm definitely ready for Captain America to swoop in and put all three of these movies to shame.

Super 8 (2011)

An uncondescending, but remarkably unoriginal throwback to the Amblin Entertainment family films of the '80s, this children-centric sci-fi piece has a group of pre-teens accidentally capturing a mysterious train crash while filming a Super 8 zombie film. The whole film has that small-town vibe where everyone knows not only everyone's name, but their familial situation and behavioral tendencies. The main characters are well-rounded in that Stand By Me way where they swear and talk tough, while revealing their childhood naivete when on the subject of girls. There are two parallel central plots, one involving the Super 8 film's makeup man and his romance with the leading lady (played by Elle Fanning), and the other revolving around his father, the deputy, and his begrudging leadership of the town once the mayor mysteriously goes missing. Without giving too much away (although the secrets of this film don't really live up to their buildup), the film starts maintaining a sort of Jaws-meets-E.T.-meets-Close Encounters of the Third Kind vibe, cribbing imagery and moments wholesale from those movies, and keeping the kids at the forefront of the action in a very Stephen King's It sort of way.

J.J. Abrams greatest flaw is also his greatest attribute; he is a terrific showman. He is aware enough of pop culture to understand how to make something seem mysterious, interesting, and potentially, deep and engaging. In this age of "bigger is better," Alias, Lost, Cloverfield, and now Super 8 have all had the benefit of Abrams genius ability to leave just enough to the imagination to make something seem infinitely more interesting than it could have declared itself to be. However, all of those projects (save for Super 8) have another thing in common; they are all known as remarkable letdowns. From the last episode of Lost to the dismal box office numbers of Cloverfield, there is already plenty of evidence out there to show that J.J. Abrams is much better at setting things up than he is at actually following through on his grandiose promises. Super 8 is no exception. Remember that first trailer, showing nothing but the train crash, the camera, and the implication that something monstrous and alien escaped the train? Well, there's very little in the movie that expands on what is implied in the trailer, and the tricks they play with your preconceived notions of the films plot are embarrassing, hokey failures.

That being said, there is much of the film to commend. J.J. Abrams has a tendency to linger on quiet, schmaltzy moments, but usually casts well enough to pull those moments off; this film is no exception, and the greatest element of the film is its child cast. From the mousy, fireworks-obsessed scamp, to the overweight, tyrrannical director, to the flaky, consistently-vomiting leading man, the youthful characters are endearing, human, and consistently watchable. The central romance between the young, shy makeup man and the brave, caring leading lady is, surprisingly, cute and inoffensive (until the silly plot contrivances catch up with it). Unfortunately, the adult cast does not survive Abrams and producer Steven Spielberg's nostalgia-tinged vision; they all come off as hokey, Peanuts-style "wonk-wonk-wonk" caricatures who are inexcusably moody and prickish one second then inexplicably heroic and stalwart the next. Noah Emmerich, an actor who, since the Truman Show, has repeatedly impressed me with his sincere, naturalistic performances, is saddled with the worst role in the show, a merciless mad scientist/power-hungry Army type who is a mustache-twirl away from Snidey Whiplash. Ron Eldard also suffers a similar fate as Fanning's town-drunk father. The adult-centric stuff takes up a good %40-45 of the running time, so the gaping faults of that section cannot be overlooked; a shame, because, until the effects-driven, cliched cheesefest of a last act, the character work and nostalgic style actually render the film a rather endearing, family-friendly piece of cinema.

Slightly Recommended to families with tough kids (there are blood splatters in this film) and fans of Cloverfield which, in the end, the film shares remarkable similarities with (down to some of the SAME EXACT FX...God, what a disappointment). I definitely prefer this to E.T., but not necessarily Close Encounters. Honestly, I'd just rewatch Jaws.

P.S. There are definitely some killer jump scares in the film, but none better than the initial train-crash itself; even though the kids would definitely be killed by all the flaming debris that juuuuuuust misses them, the juxtaposition of the devastating carnage and the frightened kids in peril is terribly effective. Unfortunately, the rest doesn't really ever live up to that moment.

X-Men: First Class (2011)

Sporadically exciting, but schizophrenic in tone, this 1960s-set prequel deals with the origin of Professor Xavier's "School for the Gifted" amidst the national and social turmoils of the era. After brief introductions to their childhood, we follow telepath Charles Xavier and human magnet Erik Lensherr as their parallel quests (Xavier's for acceptance, Lensherr's for revenge) finally intersect with their mutual adversary, the energy-absorbing Sebastian Shaw (who mercilessly killed Erik's mother in front of him to provoke his mutant abilities). Along with his companions, Mystique (the shape shifter), Dr. Moira McTaggart (the token normal human), and, later, the child versions of Havoc (with his energy blasts), Angel (flying and spitting venomous loogies), and Banshee (screaming so piercingly that it can actually propel him off the ground), Charles attempts to swiftly integrate mutants into society with a carefully constructed, CIA-funded program. However, as anyone who has ever seen or read anything X-Men related, humans are sucky and intolerant, so Charles' valiant efforts are doomed to be in vain for at least another 4 sequels. At the same time, he struggles to quell the bubbling angsts of his Holocaust-survivor partner, Erik, and his adopted sister, the insecure, blue-scaled Mystique.

The latter element, with Mystique first eschewing, then embracing her striking blue features, is the weaker factor of the film; her civil rights-lite squabbles and physical insecurities take up a lot of screen time, all with the audience knowing, full-well, what kind of gleefully empowered badass the character ends up as (easily understood, seeing how actress Jennifer Lawrence was just in the running for Best Supporting Actress at the Oscars). The other premature X-Men, Charles included, suffer from thin exposition, aside from the requisite introductions to their powers and, ultimately, their alleigance to either X or Magneto. The tie-ins with JFK and the Cuban Missle Crisis, so prominent in the marketing, is only a small factor late in the film, a "wouldn't-it-be-cool?" afterthought just designed to incorporate the X-Men into something from real-life. Rose Byrne and Oliver Platt, both quite talented actors, are wasted as "sympathetic" humans who, predictably, have absolutely nothing to do once the energy rays break out.

If half of the film is a younger-demo-skewing hodgepodge of powers, montages, and rudimentary conflict, the half of the film that does end up working is Magneto's story. 20th Century Fox had been developing a stand-alone Magneto prequel for years before they eventually greenlit First Class, and, when watching the film, it seems that they have literally copy-pasted scenes from that proposed movie into this one; the early scenes of Magneto being forced to learn his powers by Nazis, then, later, hunting them down, one by one, and killing them with the supposed knowledge that HE'S THE WORLD'S ONLY MUTANT have far more weight, subtext, and tension than any of the stuff with Charles and his band (probably due to a greater number of thorough script meetings). Along with the clearly thought out, Inglourious Basterds-esque revenge plotline, the other thing that makes Magneto's arc the most interesting aspect of the film is the performance by Michael Fassbender. Had this film been the monster hit it could've been, Fassbender would have been the monster breakout to come with it, for his European good looks mask a consistently devious, yet self-assured demeanor that makes for incredibly well-rounded, watchable villains like Erik Lensherr; compared to James McAvoy's bland, been-there-done-that Charles Xavier, he, like Patrick Stewart and Ian McKellan before him, shows that this material really lends itself to good, nuanced ACTING. The majority of the extended cast is wasted and glossed over, save for Kevin Bacon and January Jones, who, as two of the villains, perfectly maintain the over-the-top, yet weighty comic-book tone of the film. Matthew Vaughn, probably given this script late into pre-production, has injected the more traditional, "young X-Men" stuff with a color-rich, stylized palette, matching the slower, "look-what-I-can-do!" dialogue scenes with the more grandiose, action-y stuff through sheer visual technique; the faults of the film are certainly not due to Vaughn's abilities as a director. However, the script remains achingly dull and obvious, with the Magneto-centric scenes coming off the best due to the obvious care and time spent developing them, and the central "good guy" trio of McAvoy, Lawrence, and Byrne do absolutely nothing to liven up the telegraphed, patchworked plotline of the formation of Charles Xavier's School for the Gifted.

Slightly Recommended to fans of the series, the comics, or of Michael Fassbender. Matthew Vaughn jumped on this in the aftermath of Kick-Ass, which was a surprising international hit; this falls more into the realm of Stardust, with Vaughn's obviously deft visual touch overcoming a somewhat half-assed script, while failing to reach the overall impact of that film.

P.S. A montage about halfway through, with X and Magneto scouring the globe for mutants (including a wonderful utterance of the film's lone F-word), is terribly exciting in a stand-alone sort of way, and is the closest this film gets to truly incorporating the 1960s aesthetic into the X-Men visual vernacular. It will be on youtube.

The Last Airbender (2010)

I have to admit, I didn't really watch the film with its original production audio, but rather with the custom Rifftrax audio commentary that the Mystery Science Theater 3000 guys made for this one. That being said, while the viewing experience was hilarious, self-aware, and more accessible, the film itself struck me as a humorless adaptation of the animated series, with beloved characters rendered into lame caricatures and plot points, along with a painfully dull, first-of-a-trilogy plotline. I cannot give this turd a full review. But I can wholeheartedly recommend watching it with the Rifftrax in place, where the plethora of shortcomings, misconceptions, and shoddy performances become not detriments to the film, but rather its glorious, epic-fail signature. For those who actually followed the series devoutly, and expected more from a big-budget Hollywood adaptation, I am sad to say, it's just not there; from the annoying reductions of the three leads to the impotent flailings of villainous Dev Patel, there is very little here to appreciate with any sort of sincerity. The effects, my biggest hope for the production since the original teaser on last year's Super Bowl, are, surprisingly, repetitive and unremarkable, and do nothing to expand what has been seen in the promotions. I made a decision, years ago, that the strengths of The Sixth Sense, Unbreakable, and even Signs, made M. Night Shymalan worth defending, or at least, worth holding out hope for; why does he actively keep making it harder for me?

W/ Rifftrax: Recommended for fans of campy, overreaching fantasy/sci-fi such as Flash Gordon or Dune.

http://www.rifftrax.com/rifftrax/last-airbender

W/out Rifftrax: Skip it.

Kung Fu Panda 2 (2011)

Fun, but blatant and obvious, this animated sequel has the titular panda, Po, joining forces with the legendary "Furious Five" to prevent an explosive-launching peacock from conquering China. My main issue with the first movie, namely the lack of actual screentime with the Furious Five (wasting voice talents like David Cross, Lucy Liu, and Jackie friggin' Chan is pretty lame), is inherently addressed in this one; the film is, essentially, a "men on a mission" movie, with Po and the Five fighting baddies together for the bulk of the film. And in that sense, it totally works, moving energetically from set piece to set piece, while taking the time to slow down and let the characters round themselves out into more than merely figures of Po's id. This entry also expands on the relationship between Po and his adopted father, marvelously voiced by MR. DAVID LO PAN (James Hong), achieving some poignant, if obvious, moments with them by the film's end. The baddie, a sinister, insecure peacock voiced by Gary Oldman, is appropriately menacing and engaging, although not up to the viciously evil standards set by Ian Mcshane's panther character from KFP 1. While it can be easily dismissed as lazy, hammy work, Jack Black slips into this role like a glove; it optimally utilizes his energetic, childish vigor without ever hinting at his more subversive, stoner-y tendencies (which, I should mention, fellow cast member Seth Rogen can never mask). The rest of the cast is rounded out by Angelina Jolie, Danny McBride, Dustin Hoffman (whose role is sadly truncated here), and Jean-Claude Van Damme (!!!), all of whom are appropriately invisible and engaged.

My biggest gripe with the film remains, expectedly, the way it deals with its ancient Chinese backdrop. For every sweet, killer idea they introduce (the various members of the Furious Five use the fighting styles of their corresponding animals), they subvert it with something juvenile, inappropriate, and obvious (Po shoving as many steaming buns into his mouth as possible). The whole tone of the film has taken a step into the wrong direction, making more accessible for, not only younger audiences, but more international ones as well; babies and China haters alike can dig this movie. The wuxia elements of the film are too-often relegated to backgrounds and costumes, rather than motifs or mood; even the Furious Five's fight scenes are often abbreviated and, unsurprisingly, focused on Po. The recurring theme of Po finding his "inner peace" comes off as very simplistic and unremarkable given the excellent spiritual wisdom relayed to Po (and his master) by the wise, late turtle character in the original. And relegating Dustin Hoffman's wise (rat) master to little more than a bookending cameo is (such as the near-deletion of Hoffman from Little Fockers) a tragic error in judgement, with his snarky, deadpan musings remaining just as crucial to the franchise as Po's excessive girth. However, although it is not up to par with the original, or (clearly) anything Pixar has made (since Cars), KFP 2 is definitely a fun, family-friendly flick that will probably not depress the parents that must watch it with their kids instead of seeing The Hangover Part II.

Recommended to fans of the original or of the more adventurous, engaging Dreamworks flicks like How to Train Your Dragon or Megamind (which features a superior turn by David Cross). It is slight, quick-paced, and funny; for many audiences, what more could you ask for?

Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides (2011)

Simultaneously inoffensively fun and thoroughly lightweight and forgettable, this fourth entry in the Pirates franchise disregards previous leads Will and Elizabeth, and instead focuses on Jack Sparrow as he ventures in search of The Fountain of Youth. I use the term "focuses" lightly; while the central narrative actually does involve Captain Jack this time, he is merely a cog in a larger machine that also includes a haunted ship, run by the legendary Blackbeard and his daughter, a Spanish fleet en route to desecrate the Fountain for Catholicism, and the British Navy, led by a tenuously reformed Captain Barbossa. Jack drunkenly blunders his way in and around these elements, flirting with Blackbeard's daughter (who is, in a lame and obvious twist, a former flame), and fighting alongside Barbossa, leading up to the final showdown at the Fountain of Youth. If the plot seems telegraphed and obvious, that's because it is; eschewing the complicated narrative overlapping of the last two films, the writers have created a streamlined scenario with clear-cut conflicts and tensions, without very much in the way of subtlety or subtext. This both works for and against this chapter, for while the lack of pretension and heavy-handedness allows one to further enjoy both the gorgeous production design and Jack's humorous demeanor, the obvious lack of substance or any memorable, distinctive moments can be directly attributed to that decision. However, where the script fails is where the crew pick up the pace, creating lovely, detailed environments (aside from the anticlimactic Fountain, itself) that are lensed and rendered beautifully, hampered only by the restricted staging and lifeless action scenes (save for the introductory London setpiece) that can be attributed to inexperienced (and overrated) director Rob Marshall.

Another huge problem with deviating completely from the preexisting formula, and cast, of the series is the necessity to shoehorn in a new collection of characters to rival the originals. For the most part, this leads to undeveloped, undercooked, and generally uninteresting roles like Ian MacShane's Blackbeard (a tired mad pirate caricature), his daughter (an indifferent Penelope Cruz, whose entire character is encapsulated by a reference to her "fiery blood from her Latin mother"), a stowaway priest (a clearly contrived substitute for Orlando Bloom), his mermaid love interest (a clearly contrived substitute for Keira Knightley), and a lame, barely-seen captain of the Spanish fleet (a central villain with maybe 5 lines). Faring better amongst the new blood are Scrum, yet another entry in the series collection of grizzled crewmen, who, as played by Stephen Graham, is hilarious, endearing, and more of a presence than any of the glorified extras who swabbed the decks before him, and Richard Griffiths, who absolutely kills it in a cameo as King George. But, even more evident here than in At World's End, the secret weapon of this franchise remains not Johnny Depp, who has a jolly time while not bringing anything new to the table, but rather Geoffrey Rush as Barbossa. His long face, his bulging eyes, his epic line delivery, and, while posing as a good, stalwart Englishman, his splotchily dyed skin and pathetic wig all fit perfectly well into this pirate universe, and his exuberant presence, as in the third one, goes a long way into legitimizing the "piracy" of the film. By the time him and Jack were tentatively teaming up against the Spaniards, I was more on board with the franchise than I had been since the finale of Curse of the Black Pearl, and for a while, the film really allows these two characters to optimally utilize their well-worn characters for an ideal sense of breezy, humorous adventure. His contribution to the franchise, and, especially, to this film in particular, cannot be overstated; he, rather than the Keith Richards impersonation (or Richards, himself, who cameos again), is the true image of a Pirate at the heart of this world, so much so that Blackbeard, with all his supernatural fire and brimstone, just comes off as a bad Xerox of Rush's character.

Slightly Recommended for family audiences, people who really liked the previous entries of the franchise, or for action fans who have already seen Thor and Fast Five (I'd even see Fast Five again, and did, before this one). This was not nearly the disaster I had predicted it to be; time will only tell whether it survives the dissipation of its audience by one adventure-fantasy, one sweat-covered male actioner, and a unanimously approved chick flick, all of which are superior films.

Hobo With A Shotgun (2011)

Simultaneously gritty, campy, and laughably grotesque, this true grindhouse product shows a crime-ridden city, riddled with corrupt cops, psychopathic mobsters, and a general sense of anarchy, as a beaten, morally uncompromised homeless man takes a stand for righteousness. The film is straight out of the Troma school of filmmaking, which, in this case, is a compliment; the over-the-top irony of it all, the hyper-reliance on sensationalism and violence, and the cartoony, straightforward protagonist (in this case, a hobo with a shotgun). However, the production values on display are of a noticably high quality than much of Troma's output, with the gore being fully realized and awesome, the sets and cinematography feeling well-realized and unrushed, and the presence of the veteran grizzled badass, Rutger freaking Hauer. For those of you who don't know who Rutger Hauer is, hopefully you've seen Blade Runner so you know how amazing he is as the "villain," Roy Batty, in that one. Otherwise, seek out The Hitcher (the original, GOD it annoys me that I have to specify that), the film version of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, or Nighthawks to see how moody, intense, and just plain scary this guy can be. Here, his dead-serious attitude not only makes his character a blast to watch, in contrast with the outlandish, ridiculous elements that surround him, but holds up the entire film, which could have been lost in a sea of irony and self-parody without him. The rest of the cast is good, but not up to Hauer's transcendent standard, save for Gregory Smith, who successfully subverts his former presence as a child-actor in films like Small Soldiers and Harriet the Spy with his deliciously psychotic guido character (I really wish more people could have the same 'Is that Gregory Smith?' moment I had while watching him torch schoolbusses full of children and the like). The gore moments here are extreme and in abundance, unlike the other grindhouse trailer adaptation, Machete (Hobo With A Shotgun started as a short film entry for a grindhouse contest, which actually played before the Machete trailer in the Canadian prints of Grindhouse), and makes up for what it lacks in budget and big-scale Hollywood set-pieces with strong makeup and clever ingenuity; in short, it is a near-ideal Troma movie, just made without the input of Lloyd Kaufman and his cronies. My largest gripe with the film is with the "hooker with a heart of gold" character that the Hobo befriends, which was poorly acted and conceived, and, more egregiously, deflated the pace of the film. However, even she gets her moment in the sun by the end, stabbing baddies with a wonderfully improvised weapon, but that doesn't escape the fact that she serves as a grounding and realistic element in a film that gets its sickest and purest pleasures from going gleefully off the rails.

Recommended for fans of more outlandish cult films, such as Six-String Samurai or Tromeo and Juliet, or of Rutger Hauer or Gregory Smith, both of whom are phenomenally and scene-gnashingly grotesque. This one's easy to get ahold of, and it's worth hunting down as it actually fulfills its promise of being a take-no-prisoners, blood-soaked revenge picture.

True Legend (2011)

A badass, throwback Wuxia film, this Chinese kung fu saga tells the story of Su, a war hero who suffers the consequences of handing to his adopted brother, a bitter, venom-poisoned sociopath, his rightful governorship. The opening of the film is an elaborate mountain-set battle scene establishing Su as a stalwart, capable warrior. The initial melodrama moves along quickly; within 20 or so minutes, Su has risen and fallen as a hero, his villainous step-brother has already declared his intentions, and the stakes (the step-brother is in custody of Su's son) are established. Broken and deprived of the use of his right arm, Su heals in the mountains with his wife (and a holy doctor, played by Michelle Yeoh) until he is confronted by The God Of Wushu, a mystical figure who taunts him and assures him that until he can conquer him in battle, he will not be ready for his step-brother. It is here that the story becomes slightly more complex; rather than being a straight-forward wuxia revenge flick, this is just as much about Su conquering his own demons as it is about beating up bad guys. The narrative takes its time to get to its climax, and when you think the film is about to end, it has another chapter, about the West's corrupting influence in the region, that deviates from the rest of the film. However, the central theme of Su living up to his potential, and disregarding his fears, longings, and insecurities to be the best warrior (and father) he can be.

The cast is dedicated, effective, and in tune with the material; the flippant, "I have somewhere else to be" attitude of some Shaw Bros. actors is nowhere to be seen here. Vincent Zhao, as Su, goes through several remarkable character changes, and handles them, both physically and emotionally, with aplomb. Andy On is despicable and terrifying as the villainous step-brother; his physical prowess and shocking training methods keep the tension and forward momentum of the narrative going for a large chunk of the film. In smaller roles, Michelle Yeoh, Jay Chou (as the God of Wushu), and a certain late, great Western martial arts figure (who, singlehandedly, saves the last 20 minutes of the film) add a degree of class and pedigree to what could, on the surface, be easily dismissed as a throwaway kung-fu import. The other key element that separates this from your average Eastern beat-'em-up is the spectacular fighting choreography. Director Yuen Woo Ping's name is synonymous with large-scale, balletic kung-fu; aside from his legendary directorial credits, like Drunken Master, and my personal favorite, Iron Monkey, he provided the choreography for flicks like Kill Bill, The Matrix, Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, Fist of Legend, Kung Fu Hustle, and Once Upon A Time in China. He brings his legendary expertise here, with a plethora of fights that come fast and furious like Dom Toretto, each one crucially different than the last. Andy On's 5 venom fist, in particular, is a scary and awe-inspiring delight. The story is strong, and holds up (until the end), but the dynamic fighting is what makes this film occasionally pop off the screen and transcend into something signature and memorable.

Recommended for fans of large-scale Wuxia flicks like Iron Monkey or Fearless. I do not know if it contains enough universal appeal to crossover to western audiences (the crowd I saw it with seemed unsure of how to react, with genuine applause and inappropriate ironic laughter being expressed equally), but I certainly found it to be a remarkable, graciously old-school Wuxia tale.

P.S. This movie is shot REALLY well for any film, let alone an action flick. The skies, mountains, and sets of this movie are fantastic, and will tickle any of the photographically inclined who end up seeing it.

Double Dragon (1994)

I had written a longer, more comprehensive review of this film, and before I was able to publish, Blogger decided to not only stop working, but to lose its autosave of my progress. This film is not worth reviewing in full form again, but I am very disappointed that my thoughts on video game adaptations in the '90s are lost forever in the annals of the internet.

Long story short, Hollywood did not know how to go about adapting video games because they were seen as toys for children, yet had fairly violent and large-scale notions and ideas. That's how you get a Street Fighter movie where no one fights in the streets, a Mortal Kombat movie without any blood-dripping fatalities, and a Double Dragon movie where Billy and Jimmy Lee are being pursued by evil, rather than taking it out one punk at a time. They have a ghetto-looking car that they control with a video game controller. Their main physical threat is a disgusting pig man who looks like a Max Headroom reject. They wear color-coded hoodies and sweats until the last 5 minutes of the movie. They are backed up by a gang of rebellious street punks led by Alyssa Milano. And they are played by Mark Dacascos and, direct from Party of Five, Scott Wolf. Needless to say the movie's a bomb; even Robert Patrick's scenery gnashing as the villain does nothing to kickstart the movie into something watchable. The action is almost nonexistent, and the martial arts that ARE on display are absolute crap, on par with a bad Power Rangers episode (a shame, given I've seen Dacascos kick some serious ass on film).

Skip it. For context, this PG-13 flick made a little less than 2.5 mil in the U.S. box office. Less than R-rated flicks like House of the Dead, Alone in the Dark, and Bloodrayne (made by a German genius named Uwe Boll). Hmm.

P.S. Andy Dick, George Hamilton, and Vanna White play news anchors in the film. Just in case there were some of you still ready to hunt this down like I did.

Drive Angry (2011)

A surprisingly fun, self-aware enterprise, this relentlessly aggressive throwback to '70s car flicks such as Vanishing Point revolves around a near-psychopath as he attempts to rescue his kidnapped granddaughter from murderous satanists. The film never gets too much more complicated than that; aside from a couple of other characters, such as a beleaguered waitress and a mysterious "Accountant" in pursuit, the narrative is almost solely tied into the protagonist's quest for his missing granddaughter. The race-against-the-clock aspect, along with the cult aspect, reeks of '70s exploitation, and the film is definitely in that mold, eschewing logic for impact at any given moment. However, unlike similar exercises in action meta-awareness (like Shoot 'Em Up), this one actually knows where to draw its goofy/serious battle lines, with the slower moments having just as much dirty, grimey, pulpy energy as when it's at its most kinetic. That is not to say the action is not up to snuff; bullets fly at the screen, sex is rampant, and, for a film of this budget, the car stunts are surprisingly large-scale and well-rendered. And the cast, not an Ocean's 11 ensemble by any means, is wonderfully game.

I had read, prior to seeing the film, that Nic Cage plays against his strengths in this, going for a "Man With No Name" vibe, as opposed to his own patented explosivity; I call bullshit on that. While he is not screaming "It's murder! MURDER! And you're all guilty! GUILTY!!!", he is definitely aware of the silliness of the production, and takes his character to various extremes, but never condescends to the material; if I had to guess, I'd say this and Kick-Ass were more the kind of work he'd like to be doing than Sorcerer's Apprentice and Season of the Witch. As his waitress cohort and co-lead, Amber Heard is vicious, vivacious, and all sorts of awesome, giving this role a decent amount of humanity, and never once seeming like a desperate wannabe starlet running away from pyrotechnics. She has consistently turned in strong work in all that I've seen her in, but if she plays her cards right, Heard could easily make a career as a tough action heroine, sexier than Michelle Rodriguez and more fiery than Angelina Jolie. Billy Burke (who I recognized from Jane Austen's Mafia) is an effectively eerie villain, and David Morse shows up in an extended cameo as a friend of Cage, but the real highlight of the acting department is William Fichtner. Instantly recognizable, but elusively eclectic, Fichtner all but steals the film as the Accountant, seemingly toying with everybody in the film; neither a hero, nor a true villain, his character exists only to toy with civilians and to increase the stakes for Cage, both of which he does with a great sense of relish that I hope to see more of from the talented actor. He really has established himself as a modern day Warren Oates, or Elisha Cook, Jr., killing it in talented directors' work without ever worrying about being typecast or overexposed (remember his opening scene in Dark Knight?).

Highly Recommended for anyone who thinks that they'd like a movie called Drive Angry 3D starring Nicolas Cage and Amber Heard. Or for anyone who has ever said to themselves, "You know? They really don't make 'em like Vanishing Point anymore." I have. And they did.

Thor (2011)

Ambitious, inventive, and ultimately satisfying, this oddball superhero movie revolves around the titular God of Thunder as he is cast down from his native realm Asgard (read: Valhalla meets Mt. Olympus) for betraying his father, Odin's, command. After a brief, gratefully grounding introduction in New Mexico, much of the first act of the film takes place in regal, vaguely viking yet strikingly foreign Asgard. The film's greatest achievement is in its realization of Asgard; its self-contained history, its architecture, its science, and its methods of transportation are all given a fair amount of attention, which, in this day and age of assembly-line studio tentpoles, is a real blessing, and gives the Asgard sequences a sense of wonder and delight. Once Thor arrives on Earth, the film naturally deflates a little bit; after a dynamite, eye-opening first act, Natalie Portman's astrophysicist, SHIELD's slow, already-seen discovery of Thor's lost hammer, and the obvious fish-out-of-water Thor vs. contemporary New Mexico comedy deflate the pic around its midsection a bit. However, as his villainous brother, Loki, makes his political stand for Thor's rightful place on the throne of Asgard, the film gains its momentum and, while never quite reaching the apex of the opening scenes, leads to a satisfying, surprisingly convincing climactic showdown.

I must say, I had doubts over the previously-untested skills of Chris Hemsworth as Thor, but they were thoroughly unfounded; while he is going to have to work to keep up with Avengers teammates Robert Downey, Jr. and Chris Evans in the charisma department, he looks the part (much to my girlfriend's delight), he fights very convincingly (for someone formerly on Australia's Dancing with the Stars), and, most importantly, takes this stuff very seriously, that is to say he knows when to act regally haughty AND when to relax in the role a little. Among those backing him up on Asgard are Ray Stevenson, Idris Elba, and Rene Russo (as his mother), all of whom are appropriately tough, decadent, and Norse (Elba's badass gatekeeper character is a personal favorite). Anthony Hopkins is, surprisingly, effective and non-campy as the wise, tough Odin, and Tom Hiddleston makes for a complicated, volatile Loki, a stark contrast from Thor's stalwart beefcake. Inevitably, the human characters get the short end of the stick: Natalie Portman's Jane Foster is underwritten and goofy, Kat Dennings is essentially reduced to making one-liners about Thor's hot body and weird demeanor, and poor Stellan Skarsgard, clearly one of the more talented and experienced actors in the film, relegated to spouting out whatever benign dialogue the plotline saddles him with. None of them are ever even exposed to Asgard, keeping their realm of experience, and thus their interest quotient, to a minimum. However, as members of Shield, Clark Gregg is, once again, absolutely hilarious and deadpan as Agent Coulson, and Jeremy Renner makes a cameo as a certain Marvel character whose appearance is, at the same time, mercifully brief and perfectly integrated (his introductory shot elicited cheers from me and maybe a handful of other wise audience members).

Kenneth Brangah has never directed a film of this magnitude, the closest being his remake of Frankenstein, but, as with Favreau's Iron Man, you'd never tell based on his work here. Aside from the perfectly realized and rendered Asgard, with the rich, unconventional iconography, the rip-roaring action scenes, the large-scale effects sequences, and his interesting, canted angle-heavy shot compositions, he more than steps up to the plate of this grand style of filmmaking. In many cases, his bravery is commendable; there are not many contemporary directors of big-budget comic book flicks who would have had the chutzpah to dress Ray Stevenson the way he looks here (and he sure looks great drinking and gnawing on bones in a banquet hall). The old-world dialogue is concise, and rings true, marking a decided contrast with the Natalie Portman- and Kat Dennings-speak, and the interplay between Thor and the humans is far less corny and obvious as it could've been. However, the latter contains some of the least intriguing moments of the film, and, without the magnetism of, say, Tony and Pepper Potts' scenes in the Iron Mans, keep the film from attaining the modern classic status of Favreau's original masterwork.

Recommended to fans of the source material, the current generation of Marvel-sanctioned flicks, or of high-scale, big-budget sci-fi fantasy such as David Lynch's Dune, 1980's Flash Gordon, or The Chronicles of Riddick. This is above the level of The Incredible Hulk and Iron Man 2, yet not quite to the level of the original Iron Man; it is yet to be seen whether this or Captain America will be the better-remembered of this year's Avengers flicks (alls I know is, Marvel will have enough footage for a teaser by the time late-July rolls around, so...definitely ready for that).

Fast Five (2011)

A big, loud, blast of a film, this series-best entry in the Fast and Furious franchise has the ex-cop Brian O'Conner and the street-race guru Dom Toretto seeking safety from the law (and a small fortune) in Rio de Janeiro. The opening is a hilarious, wordless escape scene showing O'Conner and his girl (and Dom's sis) Mia using their small speedsters to topple a prison bus; if this is too ridiculous and/or unsatisfying for you, you know to leave the theater by the time the words FAST FIVE appear on the screen. From there, the film begins on its loose, vaguely cliched narrative drive to get every significant cast member from the franchise down in Rio, including Tyrese and Ludacris from 2 Fast 2 Furious, Matt Schulze from the original, Dom's love interest from Fast and Furious and, most graciously, Sung Kang as Han from Tokyo Drift (in which he freaking dies halfway through, which doesn't keep him from appearing in the two following sequels). This is a huge advantage of this sequel, which both responds to the 4 previous entries that set it up as well as doing something with the series that makes this entry not only stand out, but surpass all its predecessors (I cannot state this enough, for this marks maybe the only franchise where the 5th installment is the best).

Unlike Fast & Furious, which had a good amount of long, torturous drama in between the racing scenes, this one keeps them coming (sigh) fast & furious...ly. The bonkers set pieces in the trailers are only the tip of the iceberg; one of my favorite scenes, an impromptu drag race outside of a police station, is not even hinted at in the promotional materials. While the dialogue scenes are not as flat and turgid as the previous installment, they are still a little bit corny, saved by the adeptness and chemistry of the cast (save for Paul Walker, who has yet to discover how to consistently bring that actor from Running Scared out to play), particularly Vin Diesel. This series became a HUGE moneymaker only after Diesel reentered the franchise, and its obvious why; his gravely voice and his lumbering physique, along with his expressive, emotive eyes make him a perfect protagonist for this manly, steel-and-chrome-fueled series. Thankfully, unlike Fast & Furious, he is not forced to run the show alone here, and has some great supporting faces to keep things interesting. Tyrese and Luda make a great comic duo, Sung Kang is as suave and savvy as ever, and Joaquim de Almeida provides a sleazy, detestable villain.

But let's not kid ourselves; the supporting cast member that really adds the icing on this souped-up, nitrous-powered cake is The Rock a.k.a. Dwayne Johnson a.k.a. the reason this movie just had the best opening day in April of all time. Goateed, tatted up, and even more bulky than he is usually, The Rock's dogged F.B.I. agent pursuing Dom and O'Conner is so tough, so devoted, and so surprisingly funny that not only does he immediately make the film more tense and interesting when he is on screen, but he has singlehandedly bought this franchise another entry or two after this one. Two scenes with him and Diesel, one a hand-to-hand fight scene, the other a rabble-rousing speech, are indicative of everything this old-school action series is capable of, and received raucous applause from the audience I saw it with. His presence in the film makes this not only the best Fast and the Furious film, but also probably the best flick the Rock has been in, period (ok, maybe I still prefer Southland Tales, but don't tell anyone).

Highly Recommended for action junkies and fans of Vin Diesel and The Rock. Wow it feels good to say that about a new movie. This one is truly impressive; from the first trailers, I have been continually wowed by how much higher they've raised the stakes for this franchise, and the film managed to exceed any expectations I had (my girlfriend's as well).

P.S. I may have liked the film even more had they retained Diesel's killer line from the trailer: "Chances are, sooner or later, we're gonna end up behind bars, or buried in a ditch somewhere...but not today."

Blown Away (1994)

Half-Patriot Games, half-Speed, this handsome, but flat thriller involves two Irish ex-pats, one a bomb squad detective, the other a mad bomber, in a battle of wits in Boston. Jeff Bridges is the hotshot cop, the kind who rides a motorcycle and introduces himself to a potential bomb victim as "Dove...Jimmy Dove." He has decided to settle down and retire when a face from his past, Tommy Lee Jones' Ryan Gaerity, begins to blow up his colleagues in meticulously planned, diversionary bomb scares. Once he knows that Gaerity has specifically targeted him, he becomes obsessed with protecting his father, his bomb squad, his new bride, and her precocious little daughter.

You might be thinking this movie is, basically, an extended showdown between the two macho heavyweights, Bridges and Jones; unfortunately it's not. Much of the movie shows Dove defusing various bombs and traps left for him in advance by Gaerity, sometimes with some sort of note or visual accompaniment attached. They seem to have gone the Heat route, and treated each character as if they inhabited their own story, which would be great if the final overlap was appropriately satisfying; unfortunately it's not (unless you like goofy mid-90's man-wrasslin' scenes). But while Jones' story rides, primarily, on Jones eternal watchability (witnessing his ex-convict character discover the joys of hyper-Irish U2 is a true delight), Bridges is supported by a stellar supporting cast, including Forest Whitaker and Ruben Santiago-Hudson, as fellow bomb defusers, and real-life pop Lloyd Bridges in a phenomenal turn as his old man. A huge detriment to the film is the focus on Bridge's attempt at domestication with his new wife, Suzy Amis. The scenario is so contrived and cliched, with terrible, momentum-breaking dialogue ("Thinking about checking out?") that Bridges ends up being left in the cold, without a consistent character to hold on to; is he a tortured, redemptive warrior, or a battle-weary soldier looking to settle down (it is easier to dismiss Amis' bland, nonexistent performance as an indication of a decided lack of talent)? The bomb scare stuff is tense and fun, but the film continually takes time to focus on Bridges and Amis' home life, deflating any chance this film had of achieving a pace like, say, Speed. The dialogue is serviceable, and the Boston setting is used moderately well, but the main draw here are director Stephen Hopkins long, intricate bomb scares that are a joy to watch snowball and develop.

Slightly Recommended for fans of the cast and scenes where someone looks at a big bomb with a lot of wires and is determined to defuse it (i.e. The Hurt Locker, Lethal Weapon 3, etc.). Stephen Hopkins has done some terrific movies (The Life and Death of Peter Sellers, Judgment Night) and some alright ones (Predator 2, Lost in Space). This is one of the latter.

Sucker Punch (2011)

Simultaneously over-ambitious and hideously involving, this girl-power flick tells, in metaphor, the story of a group of female mental patients and their attempts to escape, both spiritually and physically. After we are given the opening titles on a stage, as if setting up a musical, the ace opening tells us, without words, how the protagonist, "Baby-Doll," got herself incarcerated by assaulting her scheming, money-hungry caretaker. Once arrived at the mental hospital, she almost immediately reverts into a sort of trauma-induced hypnosis, where in her perception, the hospital is a brothel, her fellow patients are beleaguered prozzies, and the teeth-gnashing caretaker is a reptilian, pencil-moustached pimp. Revealing much else would betray the wild, intercontextual nature of the script, and the various, dare-I-say-it, sucker punches the film provides throughout. What I can say is that there is yet another level of reality the film sinks into, and, without a set of false, loosely followed rules (*ahem*, Inception), the visuals of these fantasies are allowed to be, well, just as crazy as what you've seen in the films' promotional materials. While much of the more lavish and mind-blowing visuals are contained solely in the characters' minds, they manage to incorporate enough of the main plotline to be more than mere distractions in what is, otherwise, an intimate, introspective tale. The performances of the main girls are hit-and-miss, with Jena Malone's Rockit faring the best (her energy is infectious, whether dispensing dialogue, or dispensing asskicking) and Vanessa Hudgens, surprisingly enough (heh, heh), embarrassing herself, and looking like she'd much rather be on the set of Beastly. Carla Gugino, with her comic-book lips and physique, is perfectly cast as the resident "Madam," Oscar Isaac is a thoroughly hissable villain, and, best of all, Scott Glenn reminds everyone how truly awesome Scott Glenn can be with his pseudo-Jiminy Cricket musings ("And one more thing…").
As grateful as I was for all of director and co-writer Zack Snyder's risk taking, as well as the unabashedly FLAWLESS integration of special effects and live-action, the film did not end up coming together into perfection the way that I had hoped for. I have done a great job of keeping spoilers off of Righteous Film, and I refuse to end that for the sake of attacking the decisions made in the film's third-act, but I must call to attention the striking similarities between the ending of this film and that of a certain futuristic spoof of bureaucracy (saying which would kinda ruin it). That crib, along with several other decisions make the ending feel like a sort of acknowledgement of the films stylized, inorganic nature, which would be fine, had that been the film's only goal. However, there are lengthy scenes, with substance, that serve only to invest the viewer's emotion in the plotline, the circumstances, and the characters, and the style-over-substance ending seems to undermine these more powerful, merciless moments. Had the ending lived up to the promise of those earlier SUCKER PUNCHES (the title, if you haven't guessed, is quite apt), the film would probably be the best film of Snyder's career, and the template for a new era in action-oriented fantasy. But alas, as is, the whole thing suffers Snyder's recurring lack of cohesion in his films (save for the director's cut of Watchmen), and the movie is best enjoyed as, simply, a movie, and nothing more. Which is a shame, because the successes of this movie are beyond mere moments; it achieves a certain flexibility in its tone and structure that few films try and pull off, and even fewer films actually achieve. Maybe the originally cast lead, Amanda Seyfried, would have been the missing link to the movie that is and the movie that could be, but as is, we are left with a fascinating, yet flawed (I think I already see the problems his Superman movie will have) drama-fantasy-sci-fi-actioner.

Recommended (despite its flaws) to fans of outside-the-box sensationalism (i.e. Sin City), Zack Snyder, and GIRLS!! Seriously, hearing that the majority of the films audience have, so far, been male was a disappointment, because this is easily one of the more empowering female-centric action films I've seen in recent memory. But I guess that repeatedly shagging Ashton Kutcher, Jake Gyllenhaal, or Justin Timberlake without the threat of a long-term relationship is all the escapist fantasy that the current generation of young females need.

Battle: Los Angeles (2011)

Basically a very well-rendered, if not particularly imaginative, video game cut-scene, this actioner with sci-fi overtones concerns the military response to a hostile extra-terrestrial invasion, specifically on the coast of Los Angeles. While I disagree with Roger Ebert's half-a-star(!) review, I think he gave the movie too much credit by writing it a full-page review. This is not a full-page review type movie, because I doubt the execs ever gave a full page of notes during the whole show. This is a thin, thin, thin, thin movie, with terribly cliched dialogue, characters, and situations that even the most mildly educated cinephile will see coming a mile away ("Bye, Hoyt!"). The action is, until the end, pretty terrific, but it becomes obvious that the budget constrictions did not allow for ID4 or War of the World style carnage; even so, the more intimate battle scenes are nail-bitingly intense and well-choreographed. However, it does not fully redeem the grade-school scripting, and the movie is left to remain the cinematic equivalent of playing Gears of War for 2 hours (while being forced to watch the godawful dramatic cut-scenes, of course).

Slightly Recommended for action junkies, and fans of Aaron Eckhart, who is actually a badass and grizzled Staff Sgt. The rest of the cast is wasted, and if I see another movie where Michelle Rodruiguez pops up as a marine named "Santos," or anything similar, she will have fully lost her tough-chick street cred (although her "I got guns too, bitch" was a clear highlight in Avatar).

Salt (2010)

Unconventionally plotted, fairly riveting spy-thriller about a female CIA agent who, after being incarcerated by foreign powers, is accused of being a double-agent. The most inspired element of the piece is the script by Kurt Wimmer (Equilibrium, Ultraviolet), which initially plays it straight as a contemporary action-espionage flick, but then begins to call doubts onto Evelyn Salt's true allegiance. Keeping the protagonist a mysterious and inscrutable element for the length of the film is a very brave move for a film of this size, and I applaud the filmmakers for going ahead with something this ambitious. Angelina Jolie, as Salt, is more than up to the task of straddling the fence between sympathetic and despicable, without ever losing her enigmatic, style-savvy touch, even in a plethora of varied wigs and disguises. She was born for this sort of role, and even without Matt Damon's open-faced boyishness or Clive Owen's brutish masculinity, she carves out a presence that could go toe-to-toe with any of the contemporary spy heroes (needless to say, Daniel Craig's blonde hair would turn white after dealing with Eve Salt).

However, through truncated editing and direction, the film feels somewhat incomplete. We always feel a scene or two behind Salt's motivations, yet you sense Jolie's kismit with the role, so the fault lies with the pacing. The script, with it's bevy of double crosses, scenery changes, and dialogue-free, yet thoroughly relevant characters, was probably dismissed as confusing, and the filmmakers took it upon themselves to retain the framework of Wimmer's script, while expediting his particular brand of information dispersal. The end result is a hodgepodge of set-pieces, but without the character details and nuance that would have made this a true classic. Not only does the relevance of the action itself take a hit, but the plot twists, particularly the final reveal of the villain, end up coming across as contrived and calculated rather than organic. That being said, director Philip Noyce does display a previously-unseen talent for kinetic action choreography and spectacle that is a disctinct deviation from his usual, 1970's-cultivated sensibilities (see: Patriot Games, Clear and Present Danger, The Saint); he does not go as far as Paul Greengrass, nor as restrained and meticulous as Wimmer, himself, creating an effective, distinct style of his own. It is just a shame that the film ends up feeling like all the creative energy went to the set-pieces, and not the storytelling itself. Cast-wise, no one has enough time to really register, other than Liev Schreiber, who, once again, after X-Men Origins: Wolverine, manages to cobble together a memorable character out of a series of plot necessities and contrivances.

Recommended for fans of more difficult spy movies, such as the Holcroft Covenant or the Parallax View (read: NOT BOURNE), or Angelina Jolie; so far, there are two films which I would say appropriately convey her action-heroine potential, and while she was only second-fiddle in Wanted, this show is all about her, and, somewhat surprisingly, she lives up.

The Green Hornet (2011)

Lively, if uninspired buddy action flick about a heir to a publishing magnate who decides, alongside a faithful houseservant, to take up crimefighting to redeem his aloof, partygoing ways. That's about as much specificity as the plot allows; Cameron Diaz as the love interest is a tired rehash of Gwenyth Paltrow's Iron Man character, the buddy banter is, for the most part, disposable, and the villain is the stock superevil "head of crime in all the city" character. That being said, that villain, as played by OSCAR WINNER Christoph Waltz, is the funniest, most interesting part of the movie, as he repeatedly , and in vain, tries to come off as the scary, stock character he was clearly written to be ("Look at my gun! It has TWO barrels!!") Michel Gondry's visual work is what keeps the film afloat, in the end. There is strong production design throughout, the action scenes are energetic and clearly presented (Kato's first fight scene is pretty outstanding), and the pacing is pretty quick for a movie with literally no plot. The gas gun, annoyingly featured in every trailer for the film, is not overused, and the similarly overexposed Hornet car actually performs some surprising, original tricks by the films end. And it's nice to see two underutilized actors who saw their hayday when this time of film was in vogue: Edward Furlong and Edward James Olmos. However, the whole thing has a very been there, done that vibe that definitely contributes to this film being shoehorned into a mid-January (?!!) release; this was the only way this flick was going to break 30 mil opening weekend.

Tron: Legacy (2010)

Visually dazzling, yet somewhat contrived sequel to the 1982 classic, this time focused on Kevin Flynn's son, who enters "The Grid" in search of his long-lost father. First things first: the kid sucks. The idea of replacing Jeff Bridge's Flynn with a hot, young, blonde counterpart for modern audiences is immediately misguided, and shows how willing the film is to sacrifice fidelity and integrity for appeal to young audiences; not quite to Episode 1 lengths, but still offensively. Another aspect of the film that completely falls flat is a greater symptom than just the lead: it doesn't feel like a computer world anymore. Everyone has really expressive, vibrant emotions, there is loud, emotive techno music blaring, and the games, rather than being programmed into the system, are actually there for ENTERTAINMENT, with droves of screaming fan programs elated at watching fellow "rogue" programs be "derezzed" in the gladiatorial trials they are forced into. Olivia Wilde's Quorra character, while not only being far too spritely and animated while, simultaneously, being massively turned on by the arrival of Flynn's studly son, turns out to be from an ancient race of indigenous digital beings (spoiler alert! seriously, I just did you a favor, now you won't laugh out loud in a theater full of kids or fanboys or both), completely disregarding the construct-oriented nature of the world of Tron.

BUT!!!!!











Much of the film kind of rocks the house. Like an above-average anime, the dynamic, obviously expensive visuals prove to be so spellbinding, that there are huge chunks of the film where all the flaws of the plot magically disappear, and the visual elements of Tron that have been upgraded take over in a liquid-digital cloud of sensory bliss. The games themselves, while rendered completely nonsensical in this version, are exciting, fresh, and well-orchestrated; no shaky-cams or blurry digital rendering here. There is a club scene with Michael Sheen that takes the new, techno-oriented mindset of this Tron to the umpteenth level, with blaring music, dance-like fight choreography, and Sheen dancing around, reveling in the freedom of this untethered digital landscape. I figure if they were going to make this film about THIS Tron, and not the cold, calculating, emotion-devoid version of Tron from the original, they should've gone all the way and made it an absurdly sensational audio-visual experience, like Sheen's scene proves to be. I should also mention that not only does Daft Punk make a cameo in that scene, but they provided the soundtrack for the whole film; their contribution to the film cannot be expressed enough. Where Harold Faltermeyer's Cop Out score made a boring cash grab into a watchable film, Daft's Tron:Legacy score makes what is, essentially, a feature-length effects real into an emotional, immersive experience; their Tron Theme contains more feeling and power than any individual on-screen moment in the film. The action scenes are such a perfect marriage of sight and sound that they do end up making the film noteworthy, and completely worthy of merit, money, and attention. There should be more movies like this (and less like Avatar THERE I SAID IT!!), just made with more confidence and less concern with the affections of children (*cough* The Matrix *cough* *cough*).

Recommended to fans of high-octane, techno-oriented visuals, Daft Punk, or, to a lesser extent, the original Tron; it's a completely remade, reimagined version of the world, but there are enough bones thrown to fanboys that you can tell the filmmakers (including Steven Lisberger, who produced this one and directed the original) were fully aware of how important a 26-year-later sequel to Tron was in certain circles...but they were also aware, and wary, of how small those intimate, geek-driven circles actually were, which is a shame.

Faster (2010)

Fun, but uneven actioner starring The Rock as a recent parolee who goes on a killing spree to avenge his dead brother. That logline is about as much plot as was divulged in the marketing for the film, and that's about all you need to know; there are other plot elements, but they're window dressing. There is an assassin who is hired to take The Rock out, who, upon realizing how determined he is in his revenge, almost decides to settle down with his fiancee, Maggie Grace. There is a cop, played, with an almost unbelievable professionalism, by Billy Bob Thorton, who is also in The Rock's pursuit, while simultaneously trying to keep his heroin habit in check for his last week before retirement (he actually states how many days he has till retirement with a straight face, talk about professionalism). And there are the random gunmen who took out his brother, who now occupy such (relatively) harmless positions as a preacher, an office worker, and a club bouncer. The violence in the movie is relentless and, at least for the first half, nearly amoral; The Rock has never been this merciless or gritty on film, and it looks good on him. The story inevitably catches up with the hyper-quick pace the title promises, and the film has its share of slow patches, but the story elements are sufficient and comically sparse, and Billy Bob's subplot provides enough pathos to keep things from getting too pointless. That being said, this is not the movie it could be, nor the movie the marketing (and the title) promise it to be; it's a near-western/revenge story more Death Wish than Death Wish 2-5, just, you know, not as good.

Slightly Recommended to action buffs and non-child fans of The Rock; I could call him Dwayne Johnson, like he wants, but, dammit, he's The Rock, and The Rock should be doing more movies with names like Faster and less with the word "Walt Disney presents..." preceding them.

Red (2010)

Paper-thin, fleetingly entertaining action-comedy about a group of retired assassins who reteam to take out a public official gunning for them. The star-power driven black comedy that the marketing materials implied is not what the actual movie ends up being; John Malkovich's paranoid ravings, a central focus of the trailers, is mostly loaded onto the tail 45 minutes of the film (during which, I must mention, second-billed Morgan Freeman is nowhere to be found). The first act, nearly dreadful in its staleness, involves Bruce Willis' retired 50 year-old assassin excitedly reentering the intrigue business, along with his pension manager (oh, please), played by Mary-Louise Parker. The dialogue is tired, the action is lame and unremarkable, and the interplay with Willis and Parker is forced, saved only by Parker's natural likability. The movie reminds me of the similarly hit-man themed Mad Dog Time, in the way that it's paced as a series of guest appearances of the spies and assassins that Willis goes to for information or assistance; among them, aside from Malkovich and Freeman, are Helen Mirren, Brian Cox, Ernest Borgnine, Richard Dreyfus, and, as a rival hit-man, Karl Urban. It is disappointing to say that only Malkovich and Cox get anything juicy to work with, especially considering how effective the idea of Dame Mirren blasting away baddies with machine guns sounds on paper. Urban is strong and imposing, but no more so than when he appeared as a similarly resourceful hitter in The Bourne Supremacy. The whole thing is an excercise in futility; while it, no doubt, helped secure B.O. (and a freaking Best Comedy or Musical Golden Globe nom!) to have these esteemed actors going on publicity tours promoting their smallish parts in the film, it set up a star-power fueled film that has way more laughs and excitement than what's on display here.

Skip it, save for completionist fans of the cast, or genuine Brian Cox fans; the romance between his Russian ambassador and Helen Mirren's ex-MI6 assassin is easily the most charming, understatedly effective aspect of the film. If you told me, prior to seeing the film, that he would steal the film from such a high-wattage cast, it would probably seem as crazy as Mickey Rourke being the truly biggest badass in The Expendables. Who can ever tell with these movies?